LASHON HARA
"Who is the person who desires life and loves days that he may see the
good? Guard your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit.
Depart from evil, and do good; Seek peace, and pursue it."
(Psalm 34:12-14).
One of the most difficult sections of the Torah to understand is the discussion
of "Tzarat," a skin disease commonly mis-translated as "leprosy." In truth,
Tzarat is a physical manifestation of a spiritual deficiency. The Talmud (Arachin
16) says that Tzarat comes specifically as a consequence of "lashon hara" -
negative speech about another person.
We see a solemn story of the dangers of saying something
out of turn in the Haftarah. In this story, we see that it can even lead to
bloodshed. It is recorded in the latter half of Leviticus 19:16 that "you shall
not stand aside while your fellow's blood is shed." The story of Doeg the
Edomite (I Samuel 21-22) is often used to illustrate the harm that can be done
by tale bearing. Doeg saw Achimelekh the priest give David bread and a sword, a
completely innocent act intended to aid a leader of King Saul's court. Doeg
reported this to Saul. Doeg's story was completely true, not negative, not
secret, and Achimelekh would have told Saul exactly the same thing if asked
(which he did later). Yet Saul misinterpreted this tale as proof that Achimelekh
was supporting David in a rebellion, and proceeded to slaughter all but one of
the priests at Nob. We also recall the story in Numbers 12 where Miriam was
stricken with Tzarat (leprosy) for having spoken ill of her brother Moses, even
though what she said about him was true What's the connection between speaking
badly - gossiping about another, and contracting this skin disease?
TO BUILD OR TO DESTROY
Speech is the tool of creation - through it we can build individuals and the
world. We can praise, encourage, and give others confidence. Ancient Biblical
Judaism, was acutely aware of the power of speech and of the harm that can be
done through speech. The early sages and Rabbis note that the universe itself
was created through words consisting of the Hebrew alphabet.
The Talmud tells us that the tongue is an instrument so
dangerous that it must be kept hidden from view, behind two protective walls
(the mouth and teeth) to prevent its misuse. It also teaches that the harm done
by lashon hara is even worse than the harm done by stealing or by cheating
someone financially, because amends can be made for monetary harms, but the
harm done by an evil tongue can never be repaired.
By making others feel important, we build them up, as if to say, "Your existence
is necessary." This is life giving and life- affirming. One of the great
American rabbis of the past generation, Rabbi Shlomo Freifeld, was known to have
brought a neighbor back to YHVH and to Torah observance simply by caring enough
to say "good morning." On the other hand, speech can also be used to destroy.
Words like "you're worthless" wipes out a person's self-esteem. As King Solomon
says, "Life and death are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it (lashon
hara) will eat it's fruit." (Proverbs 18:21). The Talmud (Arachin 15b) explains
that negative speech is even worse than a sword - since it kills many people,
even at great distance.
From here we can understand a section of the Torah portion, Tazriah, found in
Leviticus 13:45-46. The Torah says that when someone has been diagnosed as
having Tzarat, they must go outside the boundaries of the city and shout
"Contaminated, Unclean!" to warn anyone who approaches. The punishment is
measure-for-measure: If you promote divisiveness amongst others, then you will
suffer divisiveness yourself.
LASHON HARA- IRREVERSIBLE DAMAGE
A Chasidic tale illustrates the point: A man went about the community telling
malicious lies about his Rabbi. Later, he realized the wrong he had done, and
began to feel remorse. He went to the Rabbi and begged his forgiveness, saying
he would do anything he could to make amends. The Rabbi told the man, "Take a
feather pillow, cut it open, and scatter the feathers to the winds." The man
thought this was a strange request, but it was a simple enough task, and he did
it gladly. When he returned to tell the Rabbi that he had done it, the Rabbi
said, "Now, go and gather the
feathers. Because you can no more make amends for the damage your words have
done than you can recollect the feathers." Evil speaking of another has been
compared to an arrow that once released cannot be stopped or recalled. Likewise,
the words spoken once released cannot be stopped from harming their intended
target . . . the character and soul of another. The person who listens to gossip
is sometimes viewed even worse than the person who tells the story, because no
harm could be done by gossip if no one listened to it. It has been said that
lashon hara (an evil tongue and speech) kills three people: the person who
speaks it, the person who hears it, and the person about whom it is told.
VIOLATIONS OF TORAH
There are 31 commandments that relate to lashon hara in the Torah. Two in
particular will be considered here. These mitzvoth specifically address
inappropriate speech or gossiping about another: Thou shall not go up and down
as a talebearer among thy peopleî Leviticus 19:16. Leviticus 25:17 says, "You
shall not wrong one another." This has traditionally been interpreted as
wronging a person with speech. It includes any statement that will embarrass,
insult or deceive a person, or cause a person emotional pain or distress. The
Chofetz Chayim, Israel Meyer Kagan wrote
several books about lashon hara which all go into great detail. The basics of
the laws are these:
You are not to say derogatory things about anyone whether they are true or not.
You are not to imply derogatory things about anyone.
You are not to listen to derogatory things about anyone, and if you do, you're
not to believe it.
To violate these Torah instructions is to become one who is known as having an
evil tongue, or one who commits lashon hara. Tale bearing is, essentially, any
gossip. The Hebrew word for talebearer is "rakheel" (Resh-Kaf-Yod-Lamed),
which is related to a word-meaning trader or merchant. The idea is that a
talebearer is like a merchant whose merchandise is gossip or tale bearing. Some
other terms that bring more understanding to the solemnity of this subject are
avak rechilut or the dust of gossip and avak lashon hara, the dust
of an evil tongue. Sometimes
a violation of Torah can be committed in lashon hara, without even saying
anything specific about another. Lashon hara could be a statement that you may
make such as well, so-and-so said something about you, but I won't tell you
because that would be wrong. The worst offense is motzi shem ra, or
purposely spreading a bad name or lie about another, with the intention of
bringing injury.
We who are attempting to walk in obedience to Torah must correct our speech,
change our habits, and learn to walk circumspectly before YHVH and men. Western
Christianity has evolved into a system that strongly preaches
what one believes, but that belief system is not necessarily expressed in
everyday living. Early Biblical Judaism is contrary to this life style. It is
not what one believed that was preached, but rather, how he lives. The words
that proceed from his mouth show his belief system.
LIMITS OF LASHON HARA
Many people make the mistake of thinking that the prohibition of lashon hara -
negative speech - is limited only to saying falsity and untruth. But this is not
so. Lying falls under a separate prohibition, expressed in Exodus 20:13, 23:7.
Lashon hara is the prohibition against saying anything negative or derogatory
about another person - even when it's true!
Often, lashon hara will couch itself in a cloak of rationalizations. It doesn't
even matter whether the words are spoken implicitly or implied. If the message
can be construed negatively, then it is a violation of lashon
hara. Be aware of potential lashon hara situations and stop them before they
start.
WHY DO PEOPLE GOSSIP?
What would motivate one person to speak badly about another? Low self-esteem.
When a person feels down about themselves, there are two ways to feel better -
either 1) make the effort to work and build oneself up (this is a lot of hard
work!), or 2) put others down. (The reasoning being, if I can lower others, then
I don't look so bad by comparison!) That's the easy way, the "quick high." But
is that the kind of person you want to be?
The first step in avoiding lashon hara is to recognize our own faults and commit
to improving on them. When I accept that I alone am responsible for my
inadequacies, then I will similarly be less critical and more tolerant
of others. If you find yourself getting "down" about yourself or others, try
focusing away from the faults and instead on the virtues. It will lift you out
of your negativity. The Torah says: Don't take the easy way out. Feeling down?
Work hard and improve yourself.
JUDGE OTHERS FAVORABLY
So what happens if we inadvertently hear lashon hara? The Talmud says that we
should not automatically accept it as being true. Rather, the rule is "innocent
until proven guilty." There is a famous story about the great Talmudic sage the
Rashash (Rabbi Shmuel Shtrashun, 19th century Vilna) who had a fund to lend
money to poor people. One day while the rabbi was studying Talmud; a man came in
to repay his loan of 10,000 rubles. The rabbi was so engrossed in his learning
that he stuck the money in the book and forgot about it. A week later, the rabbi
was reviewing his loan ledger and noticed that the 10,000 ruble loan was never
paid. So he called the man and asked him to pay it. "But I paid you back last
week," said the man. "Okay, then where's your receipt," said the rabbi, who
truly had no recollection of being paid back. "You were studying and I didn't
want to disturb you," replied the man. Soon enough word got out that the poor
man and the rabbi were involved in a financial dispute. "The nerve of this man
to pit his word against the rabbi!" they all said. The man's reputation was
ruined, and the community shunned him. About a year later, the rabbi was
reviewing a section of Talmud and came across an envelope containing 10,000
rubles. Then he realized what had happened! He immediately called the man and
apologized. "But your apology doesn't help me," said the man, sadly. "My
reputation is ruined forever!" "Don't worry," said the rabbi. "I'll make a
public announcement in the synagogue, letting everyone know that it was I who
had made the mistake." "But that won't help," said the man. "They'll think
you're just saying it because you feel sorry for me." The rabbi thought long and
hard until he came up with a solution. "You have a daughter and I have a son,"
he said. "Let's arrange for them to be married. In that way, everyone will be
assured that you are fully trustworthy, for otherwise I would never have
suggested this match." And with that, the harm was repaired. But it's not always
so easy...
SPEECH AND THE PROCESS OF REDEMPTION
The Talmud asks: Why was the Holy Temple destroyed? Because people spoke lashon
hara about each other. Thus, says the Chofetz Chayim (the 20th
century codified the laws of lashon hara), refraining from gossip is the single
most effective way to reverse the damage and bring about the redemption! Why is
it that YHVH is so concerned about this? In the big picture of the universe,
what harm does it do? It violates the purposes of Torah and YHVHís plan for man.
Maimonides said that the Ordinances of the Torah are not a burden, but a means
of ensuring mercy, kindness, and peace in the world. Lashon hara destroys the
harmony of YHVH's plan for the world. And Yahshua spoke to them, saying, Woe to
you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you pay tithes of mint and anise and
cumin, and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice, mercy and
faith. These you ought to have done, without leaving the others undone. Matthew
23:23. What does Adonai require of you? But to do justly, to love mercy, and to
walk humbly with your YHVH. Micah 6:8. Most who are taking hold of the faith of
our fathers, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, will find that they can be very
successful in regard to Shabbat, kosher eating, and the starting places of a
walk in Torah as described in Acts 15: 28-29. One of the most commonly violated
segments of Torah, and perhaps the most difficult to gain mastery in, are the
laws regarding lashon hara or, an evil tongue. This is a very important area of
Torah; few men master this Yetzer Hara (evil inclination). Disharmony will
remain,
and the full light of YHVH cannot be found in this life without mastery over
lashon hara, an evil and gossiping tongue. There is no better time to undertake
this challenge than today.
Author Unknown, I have changed some passages of this paper but essentially it is intact as the author wrote it. It surpasses any writing I have done on the matter of Lashon Hara and is a definitive study of this important subject. Rab Davis